I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. (J.R.R.Tolkien, The Two Towers)

When I carry a gun, I don't do so because I am looking for a fight, but because I'm looking to be left alone. The gun at my side means that I cannot be forced, only persuaded. I don't carry it because I'm afraid, but because it enables me to be unafraid. It doesn't limit the actions of those who would interact with me through reason, only the actions of those who would do so by force.

Marko Kloos "Why the Gun is Civilization"

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

No Muss No Fuss...Kill 'em and Never Have to See 'em or Touch 'em

Sanitized killing. Back when I was growing up and all TV programs were in black and white (yeah, we had TV way back then…but only two snowy channels), when the bad guy got shot there was never any blood or guts or gore. So killing was easy because there was never any trauma involved. As TV and the movies got more realistic that shock of seeing the blood gushing from a wound made it more realistic even though you knew as soon as the director yelled “CUT” everyone would get up and dust themselves off. So they were in a round about way saying there aren’t any consequences of taking a life. Anyone who lives on a farm knows different. Anyone who hunts for meat knows different. There are always consequences in taking a life, even if it’s a mouse or a spider or a fly.



At 11:11 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Totally unrelated but -

HEY! Aren't you the guy giving me a hard time about getting your name wrong? Who's "Madison" Madcap, huh? Some hussy stealing my thunder?! That's Maison, s'il t'plait, by golly, sir!

At 7:31 AM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

But Dear "Sweet"Lady, Have you not scrolled all the way to the bottom of my blog and read the disclamer?

At 9:41 AM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Pish! That little script is stilling sparkling, fresh out of the box. Nice try! But I'm easily mollified. Flattery's even better than the missing sugar with my tea in the morning. I'll be oh-so-nice now.

At 10:25 AM, Blogger the Contrary Goddess said...

Madison, I don't really think Horace is up on his French, especially with that funny accent. Hell, even English up there is spoken to where you can't understand it.
Contraption Godless
ps so I don't have to post again -- congrats on finishing your walk and growing as a human being sir!

At 10:49 AM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

Désolé, je ne parle pas la dame douce française

At 12:15 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Ah, monsieur, vous etes francais vraiment, en l'ame. Et tres eloquent, aussi! Si doux! (Do you need a special keyboard for the accents?)

Okay, that's stretched my high school French far enough. I concede. Your cookies are in the mail.

At 12:27 PM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

Chère dame douce, comment genre de vous admettre la défaite. D'ailleurs, alors que n'importe quel genre de biscuit suffira, je suis plutôt partiel aux morceaux de chocolat. Aucun clavier spécial. J'ai laissé ma poignée de gremlins cela.

At 12:56 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Defaite!? Non, monsieur! Jamais defaite!

Chocolate chips, huh? Keep sweet-talkin' me and we'll see.

At 3:42 PM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

Que diriez-vous du changement à l'Espagnol. J'ai sur épuisé mon Français

El chocolate salta, se calienta del horno, esa curva cuando usted los toma.

At 5:59 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

I don't have any Spanish. Are you sure we're still talking about cookies? Eleuthros Chrysostom, this would be one of your many tongues?

At 7:07 PM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

OK, que diriez-vous de l'Allemand

Schokoladenkekse. Heiß vom Ofen, diese Schlaufe, wenn Sie sie abholen.

At 7:39 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Translate sir, or be forever under suspicion! Your chocolate chips hang in the balance!

At 7:54 PM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

OK, que diriez-vous de du changement au Russe ?

Cookies обломока шоколада. Горяче от печи, они гнут когда вы выбираете их вверх.

At 8:29 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Oh dear, the cookies are all gone. See what happens when there's too much sass and not enough sweet talk? Shame, shame, shame. And they were so GOOD, too! Love those chocolate chips, mmm mmm mmm.

In Low German that would be "Schmek Gout!"

At 8:40 PM, Blogger Eleutheros said...

Sorry, MadCap, I'm busting a gut here, this is hilarious. Those translation programs from whence these comments are generated don't often make a smooth thranslation from one language to another and they do not account for double-entdres in one language which do not occur in the other.

I'm guessing the original bit to be translated was someting like:

"Chocolate cookies, hot from the oven, they bend when you pick them up."

However the Spanish comes out thus:

The chocolate is jumping, it is heating itself from the oven, this is curved when you take them ['los toma' can also mean 'you eat them'].

The German and Russian are even funnier.

At 9:41 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Yeah, when I saw "del horno" I suspected double-entendre or worse! A translation program! You CHEAT!!! I thought that was a funny French accent! Thanks for the heads-up Eleuthros - but don't tease! Tell me what the German and Russian say, please?

Well, Howard, you're just lucky I'm the kind of gal who likes smutty talk involving chocolate!

At 9:52 PM, Blogger madcapmum said...

Er... I mean Eleutheros. Of course it's on this post that my fingers skip a beat. My most humble English apologies, sir. Translate as you will.

At 10:12 PM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

OK you guys, I give up. My gremlins were laughing so hard they locked up my computer and I just now got it de-bugged.

Eleutheros had it right the first time. They all said (or that is they were suposed to say) Chocolate chip cookies. Hot from the oven, they bend when you pick them up.

When I ran the Russian back through the translator it came back...
Cookies oblomoka of chocolate. Hot- from the furnace, they are bent when you you select them upward

That's what set the gremlins off. They were rolling on the floor laughing their heads off.

And by the way, I found the translator on The Contrary Goddess's blog.

Uh, you wouldn't have any crumbs left over by any chance? Dear sweet lady.

At 2:55 AM, Blogger madcapmum said...

They bend when you pick them up? Is this some kind of southern thing due to your immense humidity?

I'm afraid even the crumbs are swept away. You'll have to try sweet talking the Godless Contrapshun now. Good luck there - maybe offer her a Russian chicken.

At 6:43 AM, Blogger H. Stallard said...

Humidity, No. It just means they are best when eaten while they are still warm from the oven before they cool off and get firm.

Ain't never had any of Contrary's cookies but she does bake a heavenly loaf of bread.


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